These four truths have shaped how I lead, coach, and live. They’re not just principles. They’re practices. I offer them to you in case they serve as a helpful lens on your journey, too.

1. The Most Important Truths Are Hiding in Plain Sight

There’s a story I’ve heard it many times—and every time, it lands with fresh meaning. Two young fish are swimming along when an older fish passes by and says, “Morning, boys. How’s the water?” They nod and swim on for a bit before one turns to the other and says, “What the hell is water?”

It’s a perfect metaphor for how we move through life. We’re immersed in assumptions, habits, and inherited beliefs—so familiar we stop even noticing them. They shape everything: our decisions, our relationships, our definitions of success. But rarely do we slow down long enough to interrogate them.

Over the years—from my time in the military to the pressure cooker of the boardroom—I’ve come to believe this: the most important breakthroughs come from one core question: What am I not seeing? Awareness isn’t a light switch. It’s a practice. A muscle. And if we don’t work it daily, it fades.

In a business meeting, it’s often what’s not said that tells the bigger truth. That pause. That look. That off-hand remark someone brushes past. Being present enough to catch it? That’s the real art of leadership. Whether I’m leading a company, a classroom, or a quiet moment of reflection—my job (and yours) is the same: shine a light on what’s hiding in plain sight.

2. Certainty Is a Dangerous Game

Two men—a believer and an atheist—sit in a bar deep in the Alaskan wilderness. The atheist says, “It’s not that I’ve never tried prayer. Last month, I got lost in a brutal blizzard—couldn’t see, couldn’t move, 50 below zero. So I dropped to my knees and cried out, ‘God, if you’re real, help me.’”

The believer says, “And here you are—alive. That must’ve been your moment of belief.” The atheist just shrugs. “No, man. Two Eskimos wandered by and showed me the way back.”

Same moment. Two wildly different interpretations. Both certain.

That’s the trap: blind certainty. We cling so tightly to what we know, we forget to consider what we don’t. We’re imprisoned by our assumptions and don’t even realize we’re locked in.

Here’s the truth I’ve learned the hard way: Confidence is essential. But unchecked confidence morphs into arrogance—and arrogance will cost you. In business. In relationships. In self-awareness. The best leaders I know are decisive, yes—but they’re also curious. Open. Willing to reframe what they think they know. They hold their beliefs with strength and humility.

Want to lead well? Want to grow? Trade some of that certainty for curiosity.

3. We Get to ChooseHow We Think

Our default setting is self-centered.That’s not an insult—it’s human nature. We see the world from our vantage point: our stress, our timeline, our pain. And on the hard days—long lines, rude people, unexpected airport delays—it’s easy to let that lens take over. But here’s the truth: we can always choose a different frame.

What if, instead of frustration, we chose grace? Instead of judgment, compassion? What if the inconvenience was the invitation—to slow down, to connect, to remember that everyone else is fighting their own battle, too?

Some of the most profound pain I’ve known—grief, loss, failure—has taught me that the one thing I do control is my interpretation. My perspective. My thoughts. And those thoughts? They determine everything.

Mindset is not a self-help buzzword.It’s leadership infrastructure. In life, in business, in everything—it’s not the situation that defines us. It’s the story we tell ourselves about it.

4. We Will Worship Something—So Choose Wisely

We like to think of worship as something reserved for Sunday mornings or spiritual practices. But the truth is, every human worships something. Money. Power. Reputation. Beauty.Achievement. Validation.

None of those are inherently bad. But when they become our source of meaning, our compass, our identity—we’ll never feel whole. We chase more. We compare more. We fear losing it. And slowly, we drift from who we are into who we think we’re supposed to be. The most dangerous thing about these forms of worship isn’t their obviousness—it’s their subtlety. They creep in unnoticed. They become default settings.

Here’s what I’ve learned:

>      If I build my life around how I look to others, I’ll never feel known.

>      If I anchor my value in achievement, I’ll always feel behind.

>      If I measure success by wealth or acclaim, it will never feel like enough.

But when I choose to live by design—on purpose, aligned with what I know matters—I experience something different: Peace. Clarity. Joy. True freedom. And that freedom? That’s where meaningful leadership—and a meaningful life—begins.

Final Thought

The world is noisy. The distractions are relentless. But we still have a choice—every day. We can live on autopilot.Or we can live awake. So today, take inventory. Wake up.Look around. Consider another perspective. Ask the better question. Choose your focus. And don’t miss out on life in the name of chasing it. There’s no dress rehearsal. You get one shot. Make it count.

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